How To Make Project Meetings More Efficient and Productive In One Simple Step

Short post today. One simple step to take to keep project meetings short, effective, and productive:

Have one person in attendance whose main function is to interrupt conversations as they derail with a quick “Shut The Fuck Up.” It needs to be someone who has some respect among those in attendance, but probably not the most senior person at the meeting, as he will be the most frequent target of the comment.

Whenever a project update meeting drifts into group design – “Shut The Fuck Up”

An impromptu recounting of the history of the building the project is going to be located erupts – “Shut The Fuck Up”

The 2 hour conversation you had last meeting about a trivial point starts revving up again – “Shut The Fuck Up”

Discussion on a topic continues (or more accurately, replays) after a decision has been made – “Shut The Fuck Up”

Someone dithers for the tenth time over a decision they were supposed to give a definitive answer to months ago – “Answer Now, Quit, Or Kill Yourself” (This task is not as simple as just repeating four words, or else a Furby could do it – if Furbys still exist)

Why yes, I did just come back from a three and a half hour project update meeting, why do you ask?

PS – The person you assign this task to must also a)be protected by enough of upper management AND the people who actually do work so as not to be fired immediately; and 2)be independently wealthy so that they don’t starve when a) is not enough.


3 responses to “How To Make Project Meetings More Efficient and Productive In One Simple Step

  1. I don’t think that person will be respected for long once he or she starts saying that sentence constantly. Probably most people won’t go with this task, and I’m not sure if the team members and other stakeholders in a meeting will accept this language (maybe it should be toned down, such as: “We don’t wanna discuss this at the moment”.

    PS: Here’s an article on meeting efficiency that discusses the subject from a different perspective.

  2. This is an interesting view on a project meeting. Haven’t been involved with too many many project meetings, but have done large training’s and meetings before. I appreciate the post from a couple days back, sorry it has taken so long to get back to you. We were in the process of transferring over our website.


  3. It’s funny because its true…. 🙂

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